Theme Weddings
Every once in a while you go to a wedding that has a little bit of a theme to it. You might have a Victorian wedding with old-fashioned tuxedos and a wedding dress, or a Scottish-themed wedding where the groom wears a kilt (”IT’S NOT A SKIRT!”). These themes can be nice and elegant, but are they really that memorable? How about some more exciting themes? C’mon….give the audience something to remember:
–History of the World wedding: The ceremony starts off in the dark, with the pastor communicating in grunts and noises. About halfway through, fire will be discovered and we can finally light the candles.
–LOTR wedding: Your ring bearer is Gollum, who will be crouched on the piano muttering something about his “Precious” through most of the ceremony. The minister can be Gandalf.
–Smurf wedding: Involves lots of blue shirts and white pants with footies. (The only problem with this theme is that you can only have 1 female for every 100 males.)
–Detroit Lions wedding: There are no rings, and the minister is fired and replaced numerous times during the ceremony.
–Michael Jackson wedding: Um, has anyone seen the ring bearer?
–Survivor wedding: The bride and groom will each have a tribe. Throughout the ceremony, there will be “in-unity” challenges. Those not voted off by the end of the ceremony will be able to go to the reception. Anticipate something like this:
Pastor: The fourth person voted off of Survivor: Cincinatti Matrimony is….James Smith.
James Smith (Walks forward.): Man.
Groom: I’m sorry Grandpa…the tribe has spoken.
(Pastor extinguishes Grandpa’s candle.)
Bev responds:
Posted: June 13th, 2006 at 7:23 am →
How about a dr. Seuss wedding.
Vows included
Pastor: Will you answer me right now
These questions, as your wedding vow?
Groom: Yes, I will answer right now
Your questions as my wedding vow.
Pastor: Will you take her as your wife?
Will you love her all your life?
Groom: Yes, I take her as my wife,
Yes, I’ll love her all my life.
Pastor: Will you have, and also hold
Just as you have at this time told?
Groom: Yes, I will have, and I will hold,
Just as I have at this time told,
Yes, I will love her all my life
As I now take her as my wife.
Pastor: Will you love through good and bad?
Whether you’re happy or sad?
Groom: Yes, I’ll love through good and bad,
Whether we’re happy or sad,
Yes, I will have and I will hold
Just as I have already told,
Yes, I will love her all my life,
Yes, I will take her as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love her if you’re rich?
Or if you’re poor, and in a ditch?
Groom: Yes, I’ll love her if we’re rich,
And I will love her in a ditch,
I’ll love her through good times and bad,
Whether we are happy or sad,
Yes, I will have, and I will hold
(I could have sworn this has been told!)
I promise to love all my life
This woman, as my lawful wife!
Pastor: Will you love her when you’re fit,
And also when you’re feeling sick?
Groom: Yes, I’ll love her when we’re fit,
And when we’re hurt, and when we’re sick,
And I will love her when we’re rich
And I will love her in a ditch
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold
Ten years from now a thousandfold,
Yes, I will love for my whole life
This lovely woman as my wife!
Pastor: Will you love with all your heart?
Will you love till death you part?
Groom: Yes, I’ll love with all my heart
From now until death do us part,
And I will love her when we’re rich,
And when we’re broke and in a ditch,
And when we’re fit, and when we’re sick,
(Oh, CAN’T we get this finished quick?)
And I will love through good and bad,
And I will love when glad or sad,
And I will have, and I will hold,
And if I might now be so bold,
I’ll love her my entire life,
Yes, I WILL take her as my wife!
Pastor: Then if you’ll take her as your wife,
And if you’ll love her all your life,
And if you’ll have, and if you’ll hold,
From now until the stars grow cold,
And if you’ll love through good and bad,
And whether you’re happy or sad,
And love in sickness, and in health,
And when you’re poor, and when in wealth,
And if you’ll love with all your heart,
From now until death do you part,
Yes, if you’ll love her through and through,
Please answer with these words:
Pastor and Groom: I DO!
Pastor: You’re married now! So kiss the bride,
But please, do keep it dignified
Jan responds:
Posted: June 13th, 2006 at 9:35 am →
The idea of themed weddings you have here, would be great for a comedy bit - - I love this.
Rachel responds:
Posted: June 13th, 2006 at 12:46 pm →
I was rolling from Bev’s Dr. Seuss Wedding. Good Times.
I would like to see a themed wedding like Mideival Times. That would be fun!!